Monday, September 10, 2012

What the Hell Happened?!

This weekend was a bit different than I normally have.
I actually had a Saturday off!
I know, I know....most of you can't fathom not having a Saturday off but I'm usually working.
So on this rare Saturday off I did.....nothing.
I'm done saying Saturday.

Friday I got a free bottle of wine from a guest so my plans were dinner at home with wine and a movie, wooo! That night I checked my dating profile, yep, and read through some of the messages.
1) Hi, my name is Chris I'm a married guy who usually is looking for a married woman but I am willing to make an exception to you. Would you be willing to meet regularly so that we can f**k and then not tell anyone.
I did not reply back. Instead I sat there in silence and realised two things. He is looking for another married woman so they are less likely to tell his wife because that means the husband would end up finding out. Also, he doesn't really care about being found out because he has a photo with his face in a YouFit gym tanning room. I'm debating on printing a copy of his profile and sharing it in every YouFit gym asking...."Have you seen this husband".
2) Hi - 5:00pm
how are you - 5:15pm
where are you?! -5:42pm
hi - 8:00pm
y wont u talk to me?!?! - 8:15pm
I want to talk - 8:17pm
hello!!!! - 11:30pm
Wow....just wow.....
3) You are most beautiful I want to make sweat love to lips. I kiss you much through the night. I want to hold your face and stare at you eyes. OK honestly I thinking we do good together. Why wont you write me back I am great lover and have a car.
OK, so besides the fact you can't write or put together actual sentences am I to be wowed by the fact you have a car? Where is the job or a house?
Sooo...that was my Friday night....slim pickings.

Saturday I slept in and loved it. I just read in bed with my dog just staring at me and the cat sitting on my stomach.
The cat needs to go on a diet.
Once I got up I decided cleaning sounded like a plan, which then turned into me rearranging my living room furniture.
I rewarded myself with some quality NetFlix time which the fat cat was not happy about.
Great Door....Horrible Window
 My mom and grandma went to visit a friend for dinner in St. Pete so I was the ever so loving daughter and went to their house to run out their dog.
Who loves me more than them.
While there I picked up a box of my things which had clothes, DVDs, books, and little odds and ends.

I am in love with Karen Marie all her books back, YAY!
His eyes pop out when you squeeze him,
he now sits on my desk at work
I now have a full shelf of books to read after I finish re-reading all the books in my Nook (I'm saving money).

Sunday, as my last day of eating badly and being a lump, I ordered myself a pizza. If you ever want to see how amazing your Pizza guy is ask him to do the following.
To draw a unicorn on your box.
 There is a comment field when ordering on-line for special instructions for the driver. Go ahead and write it in there and see what happens. The guy didn't say anything as he handed me my food but he was giving me a weird look. When I got inside I busted into laughter....
I got TWO!!!!!!!!! posts might get a little more grumpy now that I'm not drinking caffeine or eating junk food anymore.
Wish the people I know me luck this week!

Til next time Lovelies


Nikki said...

I need to cut back caffeine. Publix has 20 for $10 yogurts which are only 2 WW points and part of my new eating healthy plan :)

Eve Myers said...

I need to cut back on the caffeine as well! But...we'll see if that happens. Started following you from the GFC Blog Hop!

Danette Dillon said...

New follower from the Blog Hop. I'm looking forward to reading more.